Been on a Hiatious!!!

I haven't blogged in awhile and actually had forgotten that I have a blog. So, much has been going on. However, now I feel it's a must I get back to blogging. It's a great way for me to vent and realize some emotions and things that have just been on my mind.

1st since my daughter has been on summer vaca I have been taking a vaca of my own. No child, no hubby, juse me, myself, and I. I'm using this time to reflect on somethings, feel better about myself, and also spent time with family and friends that I haven't spent alot of time with in recent years. In the month since I've been away I've come out of my shell (feeling better about how I look and changing my style of dressing). I've become more comfortable with wearing my arms out and have started wearing dresses and skirts more! I remember when I first started college I use to wear my arms out, but as the years passed and I put on weight I felt my arms were to big and feared that others would look at me. However, I've noticed that my arms don't look bad, and as for people looking and talking, that's all in my head!!!

2nd Lately I've been missing my dad more and more. My dad passed away when I was 4 as a result of stomach cancer. As I got older it got better, but the last 3 yrs. I've realy been missing him. This past father's day was Extremely Difficult for me!! I mean I know he's in a better place, pain-free, but I just wish he were physically here. So if you have a father that is still alive cherish that!! Even if you don't have the best relationship. There are people like me that wish they could pick up the phone and call their dad, wish they could be held in his arms, and that they could hear his voice JUST ONE MORE TIME!!!!

Me Time

I'm come to the realization over the past few months that I need some serious "ME " Time!! After being with hubby for so long and having our daughter I feel that I've just let myself Go!!! Now more than ever I got to get back to the ole me, the me that took pride in her appearance, the me that had goals and strived to achieve them!! For along time I haven't been happy and I need to find the happiness that is Desparately Missing in my life. If I"m not 100% happy then what good am I to my hubby or my child!! Hopefully, the Me Time will be a big help and I'll find the happiness tha I once had and be made whole again!!!

Feeling Like a Lost Child

My title describes how I'm feeling right now!! I'm feeling this emptiness inside and I don't know why!! I told my hubby earlier today that I just feel empty inside and he has suggested that I see someone. I don't mind going to see someone, but I don't want to be judged nor do I want to be medicated!! Sometimes, I just feel as if I have no purpose in life .

Emotional Roll-a-coaster

It's been awhile since I've last blogged, and I must say I've Missed It!! I'm going through some emotional things right now, and I've been kinda feeling that I need to get back to Release what I"ve been feeling!!! Today, for some reason off and on I've been in thid Funk!! I woke up this morning feeling kinda of down, why? I guess life and me not being pleased with myself right now. Today, I went through alot of what if's and regrets!! I've cried a lot today, and it has helped, but the pain is still there. Sometimes I just really no longer want to the Responsibilities of Adult Life!! I wish at times I could be back at home with my mom and only had to worry about ME!!! I did go and volunteer today (made me fee a little better), did a little shopping, treated myself to lunch!! I got home talked with my hubby for a little bit and shut myself in our bedroom for a little bit. I was crying, talking to God,  and listening to William McDowell (Give Myself Away). The phone rang it was my cousin that!! We talked about stuff, laughed, and she just listened. I must say after talking and laughing with her I felt much better!! Her phone call was definitely right on time!!  I really don't know what the real root of this emotional roll-a-coaster that I'm on is, but I do know tha something must give!!

People, Please Pay more Attention!!!

Okay, today my daughter and I were innocently traveling to the laundry mat when out of nowhere this idiot pulls out in front of me. Luckily and by the grace of GOD I was able to stop in time!!! No one was hurt, Thank GOd, and no cars were damaged!!! Afterwards, I was shaken up a little bit, but otherwise okay. My daughter was OK. she found a ladybug when we were in the yard and was playing with it at the time. That's why I titled my post, Pay more Attention!!! Clearly, the guy wasn't pay attention because if he was he wouldn't have pulled out in front of me!!! I mean our front bumpers could have kissed one another (I stopped that close to his vehicle)!!! It was no one but God that prevented me from hitting his vehicle... I braked with all my might to prevent from doing so!!

What Happened to "Respecting Others!!"

Okay, it's been a minute since I've blogged, but never the less I'm back!!! Let me first start off by saying I'm a pretty easy going chick and don't bother anyone unless I"m pushed to do so. I try my hardest to respect others and especially Respect their relationships!! Having said this others don't!! Okay, hubby had this employee (female). To make some extra money I had her come and clean my house a couple of times, but the last time I wasn't pleased so....I told hubby I didn't want her to clean my house anymore. Hell, if I'm going to pay you, do the job right! Don't half ass do stuff!! Anyway, off topic!!

So...a couple of months ago I see a text on his phone and she's asking him for money!! Where dey do dat at? I politely texted her back and told her not to text my husband anymore asking him for money!!! Saw no more texts...Okay, today I hear him talking to his assistant and he asks her, "has your girl called you?" Didn't hear her response, but he responds she sent me a text asking for money.. Livid was my mood at this point!! So... I ask him did she text him and he responds, "yes!!" I say I want u to text her and tell her to stop texting you and tell her that I SAID SO!! He did so and she hasn't texted him since, but my thing is who does this chick think she is?!!! Okay, you worked for my husband, cool ya'll talked about different issues, but ask him for money, HELL NO!! Now, the type of person I am I wanted to find her and KICK her ASS!!! Why? Because this is oh so wrong on so manyyyyy levels!! You don't dare ask another woman's man for money!!! Okay!!!! you got your own man, ask him!! Now, do I blam hubby, yes. Why? Because he could have nipped this in the bud from the beginning and told her don't ask me for money, it's very disrespectful to do so!! I'm still a little heated behind this and I have been very tempted to call my cousin (can always count on her) and do a serious BEAT DOWN!! Some might say oh, she's going to FAR, but she's gone to far by disrepecting not only me as a woman, but my marriage!! We (some) have got to have more respect for the sanctity of others' relationships!! So officially, Maria (that's her name) has been placed VERY HIGH on my doo-doo list!!!

Change can make you have a better mindset!!

Okay, I've been laid-off since Sept. 10, and since we are down to one reliable income source I'm learning to become more frugal with our money. What am I doing? Couponing and learning to cook more at home!! If you haven't started couponing I Strongly Suggest that you Do!!! I have saved sooooo much from doing so. For ex. this week at Harris Teeter is Super doubles week ( 1.50 coupon is doubled to 3.00) before any coupons or saving from using my vic card my balance was $98 and some change. Well after coupons and vic savings I only paid $24.03 out of pocket. What did I get? Well, I got milk, yogurt, danimal smoothies, strawberries, egg rolls, rice, chicken breasts,cereal, spices, and some other stuff but can't remember. Because of the super doubling at Harris Teeter I got my milk, yogurt, smoothies, rice, and cereal for free. Through couponing and blogs my whole outlook on things has changed. Instead of going out to eat alot we usually just come home and eat.

 I'm also trying to do a meal plan each week. The meal plan does help. You don't have to stick to it persay (can choose to switch what you're cooking). This week I planned our meals around what I already had in my fridge and cabinets so, when I wtn grocery shopping I didn't have to buy much meat. Our budget is usually $60 but this week I only spent about $40 (fruits and veggies included).

Just tried it and LOVE IT!!!

Okay, I'm not a make-up person and I know others have already tried this, but better late than never! Okay, CVS has a sell on select Myabelline mascara 2/$10, I had some Extra Care Bucks soooooo I decided to treat myself. I have heard fellow you tubers give rave reviews on this product, Maybelline the Falsies volum Express and I Love It!! I could immediately tell a difference in my lashes. In my opinion, it's a must try!!

In Love with this Conditioner!!!!!

Okay, sooo I've been using Salon Selectives Moisture Renweal Conditioner for awhile now (over 2 months) and the results are always the same!!! This conditioner makes my hair feel like butter (sooooo soft) as soon as I apply it. I first tried it on my daughter's hair and it did well her on hers. You can get it from Big Lot's for $ 3 for a 33.8 oz size (very big container). We're still on the same original bottle I first purchased and I use it liberally on our hair!! It not only works well, but smells awesome!! If you haven't tried it I encourage you to. Not a bad deal for $3. It also has protein in it.

EVERYBODY ZUMMMMMBA!!!

So.....I've been wanting to try Zumba for sometime and knew of a place that offered the class for free, but never took the time to go!! Well....Valentine's Day for some reason I got the urge to go, and let's just say I was veryyyyyy pleased! The class was awesome. It's a mix of hip-hop, latin, and salsa music. There were all ages and all physical levels. I took my 5 yr. old daughter and she had a BALL!!! After the class on Mon. she says, "mommy I want to come back everyday this week!!" Tooooo cute I know. However, the class is only offered 2x a week. We went again tonite, the instuctor put out some new mooooves that had everybody like, What?!!!! I'm going to try my best to keep it up going everyday they have it (Mon. and Thurs.) Next month I will be taking a course at the community college so, I'll be missing the Monday class, but I plan on hitting it up on Thurs. If I can combine eating half-way decent, drinking plenty of water, and doing Zumba I will reach a goal of mine  I have in no time!!!! What was amazing is that the time goes by SOOOO quickly (45mins.) By the time you are really,really tired, and just seem like you can go no further; we're cooling down and class is over!!!! You will definitely enjoy yourself!! 

Don't use children as pawns!!!

So this weekend  hubby helped his brother move his washer and dryer to his new place. After they finished they were standing outside talking. Brother tells my hubby that his ex-wife is not wanting to let him get his son for the summer! Why you ask? Because she's toooo concerned about who he's seeing!! Say what? Okay, I understand being concerned about your child being around some random female, but he's been with this girl for awhile. Talk to her on the phone or come to meet her, but don't use that as the only reason!!! Okay, she (ex-wife) has had previous relationships  and the brother has never tried to take his son from her. Not only did she say no to that, but she also said, "Oh, that's why another mans taking care of your son!!!!" Ohhhhh, that's a beat-down, no doubt!!!

Let me give you a little history on the situation: brother is on dialysis and can't work. He is trying to get disability, but that takes time (they're very slow)!!! He has made the arrangements that when he gets it child support will come out of it. Okay, he can't work, the court knows it so..... what gives her the right to say that to him. That was a low blow. Mind you she's just gotten out of prison  for felony charges (selling pills). So it was a point when she wasn't working. It broke my heart hearing that and it's so sad that when parents can't really get along the child(ren) are always the one(s) to suffer. I pray she has a change of heart and will allow him to be with his dad for the summer. I'm SOOOOOO grateful I don't have to deal with all this babymomma/baby daddy stuff!!

No Respect Anymore!!!!

Okay.... Believe we officially have the neighbor from hell!!! We moved into our home in 2007 and it was bearable. I mean they were loud, but we managed. If it wasn't their 3 kids screaming and yelling, the husband working on his many vehicles revving up the engines, or his target shooting. Okay.... in come 2k10 they finally move, Must Say this was the Most Peaceful Time of our Whole time here!!!!! Then I guess someone started using the house for band practice (very loud again), then they went away. Peace at last, or soooooo I thought. Now someone has moved in and I think the dude is Really Insane!!! He plays music at weird times of the night. I'm talking like 9pm and later. It was sooooo loud one nite I actually called the police, but then I thought he had finally stopped so I called and cancelled the call. Then it's the target shooting. My baby was sitting at the table a couple of weeks ago doing her homework and she was scared!!! As I'm writing this right now his music is still going!!! I mean he's really getting on my nerves. I don't want to get the police involved because I don't know him or if he's rational at all, (don't think he is by his total disprespect for his neighbors) but I Do Know that Something has to Give!!!! I've prayed that he would just go away!!! I think I might send him a nice letter asking him to just keep his noise down and be more respectful of his neighbors!! I mean we purchased our home and should have every right to enjoy every inch of it in Peace!!! Maybe if I pray hard enough things will get better?!!! 

Use your God-Given Common Sense

Soooooo I'm in the circle to drop off my daughter for school, and notice a little boy in the car in front of me!! Granted we're in NC and the temp is in the low 20s. The little boy had on a short-sleeved shirt. My first reaction was, "I know his parents aren't sending him to school without a warm coat?" A few seconds went by and he did put on a coat, but I was still on the short-sleeved shirt. As parents it's our duties to ensure our children are properly dressed for the weather. While we were at home I ensured my daughter was warm by: putting long sleeves on her, warm thick pants (velour material) attaching her liner to her coat (she has a 2-in-1 coat), I put her hood on, ensured the coat was snapped around her neck area to shut out the cold (complained about it hurting her neck), and put warm mittens on her. Now she may have felt I went overboard, but I'd rather go overboard than have my daughter freezing!! It wasn't just this incident I've been to her school and seen several kids dressed INAPPROPRIATELY for the cold weather. Kids in capris, kids with no jacket or coat, or kids in shorts!! Now this just breaks my heart!! Now I don't know they're situation and I'm certainly not going to judge anyone, but regardless of one's economic status we need to make sure our kids are dressed properly!!!  We've got to do better as parents!!!

Laugh everytime

Now I enjoy frequenting FB to reconnect with old friends, find new friends, and vent every now and then. The one thing that I find hilarious about FB is how people change their relationship statuses so often. Okay, why must you post that you're in a relationship and it's complicated? Okay IMO if your relationship is complicated then bottomline you're not in a relationship!! When our anniversary came up my hubby posted that he wasn't in a relationship that was complicated or an open relationship. He was simply....MARRIED!! Then when people put up status changes like this they wonder why people talk about them. Learn what true relationships are made of. The reason for all the relationship status changes could be the fact that these individuals aren't married. Maybe if they were married there would be no need for the constant changes. I would close this with the thought that if one has to question the stance of their relationship it might be best to just consider yourself single until it's fully confirmed that only 2 people are in the relationship!!!

What happens when you can''t keep your hands out your hair!!!

So.....I'm sitting watching Beyond Scared Straight and running my fingers through my hair (I have a habit of constantly having my hands in my hair). Anyway, I did a twistout the other day and it still looks good, but I wanted to try something different. So.... I thought of an updo I saw Kinkycurlycoil from yt do on her twistout. The verdict.... I like it. I'm not really good at doing french rolls so.....I french-braided it up and just let hair out in the front for a bang. I will visit this style again. Something different, but different is good, right?

Finally one I love!!

I see my fellow naturals with the pretty full  twist-outs and envy you guys!! I say, 'dang why can't my twist-out look like that?" Well today I decided to take my twists out (been in for almost 3 weeks). The more I blog the more you'll come to learn that when I do twists I don't believe n taking them down until 4 wks or later. I'm a firm believer in making my do's last. Anyhoo... back to the matter. Took my twists out and the results were great!!! I think what's so different this time is I made the twists a lot bigger than usual. So I pat myself on the back and pray the next time I'll get the same results. My experience just proves never give up, if at 1st you don't succeed try, try, try some more until you get the results you're looking for. Until next time...Keep loving yourself, your naps, kinks, curls,  hair knots, bad hairstyles. Heck...love it all!

I Use to Be Fat

I don't know if anyone has watched the show, but it comes on MTV Wednesday nites at 11 am. I've  watched  a few episodes so far  but none effected me the way last nites episode did. I think it was a repeat. Anyhooo, the girl's name was Makenize (sp). She described herself as being the fat friend. For as long as I can remember I've always been heavy. Even as a young kid (kindergarten I was chunky). I can remember coming home from middle school in tears because the kids (2 in particular) teased me something awful. I wouldn't dare repeat the names I was called on here, but just know they weren't nice. Anyway, back to what Makenize referred herself to. I remember walking in the mall with  friends  from high school (one was smaller and the other heavy set), but all the guys were focused on the smaller friend. I mean I've always considered myself a good-looking female, but why all the attention focused on her just because of her size? Why does society often ostracize females that are heavy, full-figured, plus-size? I mean we aren't contaigous, or any different from the smaller females. We have good hearts, are good people, and have goals in life!  I can remember an incident while in college, some friends and I were out I saw some cute guys. I hollered at them (you know heyyyyy)!! The look they gave me was like, " why is she speaking to us?" Some things I've gotten over, but some of the things, the words are still with me! I fear and worry about my daughter soooooo much and just hope and pray she doesn't have an issue with her weight. It's just sooooo sad that individuals in life are sooooo superficial that they can't see the true beauty that one holds!!       

What's going on with the youth of today?

Okay, when I first read this I was dumbfounded. One, how do 2nd graders even know what oral sex is?  2. Why did the teacher that was present not step in to stop this Very Inappropriate Behavior? Reading headlines,stories like this have me terrified as a parent. My daughter is 5 yrs. old and I could never fathom her doing anything like this. I mean 2nd graders and any type of sex just don't mix. What have they been watching? As parents today we have got to do better. No we can't shield our children from everything, but this is Oh So Wrong on Sooooooo Many Levels. I wonder how the administrators explained this to the parents. I clearly wouldn't want that job. What do you think?   


http://www.bvblackspin.com/2011/01/21/second-graders-caught-engaging-in-oral-sex-with-a-teacher-presen/